Today, I am 11 days away from my official due date. Knowing this has greatly shifted how I operate. I find myself looking less and less into the future and more and more only at the moment in front of me.
I’ve woken up a couple nights this week with pains. I’m not sure if they were contractions or not. I wished and hoped they were. I waited before going back to sleep, watching the clock to see another one occurred. Hoping it would be our time to head to the hospital.
But as of right now, the little one is still kickin’ around inside of me.
There are a couple things that pregnancy has engrained in my being that I know I will never forget. One thing stands out above all else.
We create our own experience.
I think one of the most difficult things about life is how frequently and powerfully others try to push their own experience onto us.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve spoken with a lot of women. I’ve asked them for their opinions and stories of their own pregnancy experience and there was great value in that for me.
The not-so-fun part happens when someone shares their experience with you as if it your own. Assuring you of how it WILL BE for you.
The nausea, the pains, the swolleness, the weight gain, the birth-horror, the misery.
Yes, these are possible outcomes for your experience. Yes, other people have experienced this before. But lots of other people have experienced many other wonderful things as well.
Peace, joy, a deepening of love, great sex, revelations, expansion, a deeper understanding of their body.
And beyond what we know of both the good and the bad side of things, there is a whole other world of we don’t know that we don’t know.
I’m grateful that from the beginning of my pregnancy experience I was open and committed to creating MY OWN experience. This has allowed my pregnancy to be whatever it showed up as and whatever I allowed it to be for me.
In one word, connection.
It’s taught me how to be with myself in this moment. Being present and aware to my experience instead of determining and defining what it is before it even has a chance to unfold before my eyes.
I invite you to do the same with your life. Where are you taking on other peoples stories or experiences instead of having your own? Where are you telling yourself stories about your experience that are hindering more than helping? Let go. Trust. Be present. Create.
Photo Credit: Syda Howery